The five ladies gathered at the guest services desk were not happy campers. The ship on which they were sailing had thrown a major party the night before, and it happened to be in the venue directly beneath the two staterooms in which they were booked. As one loudly declared, “We’re not just complaining. We want compensation.” A split second later, she corrected herself. “No, we demand a refund!”
Nice Try, But…
The youngish man unfortunate enough to find himself on the wrong end of this particular complaint was incredibly patient with the white-haired golden girls. As I sat nearby, casually eavesdropping (as one will), he tried explaining that there was not much he could do. One of the women insisted it would be appropriate that they be moved into a suitable suite. Another suggested full refunds.
Inevitably one said the seven words most often attributed to people of both sexes who are collectively known as Karens: “I want to speak to your manager.”
The issue was escalated and the women ultimately received a negligible amount of onboard credit, but it’s safe to say they weren’t thrilled with the outcome.
Location, Location, Location
Longtime cruisers will be quick to point out that the fault was not that of the cruise line, but of the passengers themselves. One of the most important things to take into account when booking a stateroom is not only its location on the deck in question, but what is both above and below the cabin.
Deck plans are available for every ship, making it easy to do a quick check. Ideally, most of us would prefer to avoid being above or below a nightclub or other venue which might conceivably host loud events or activities, be it in the morning or late at night. Other places we tend to avoid are staterooms directly above or below…
• …dining venues. Even if the restaurant in question doesn’t open until mid-day, that doesn’t mean the space won’t be bustling with crew members setting things up or that it won’t host activities.
• … nightclubs. Dancing until dawn may be a whole lot of fun, but trying to sleep in a stateroom adjacent to the music that keeps folks moving and grooving? Not so much.
• … bowling alleys. Yes, we live in an age where you can bowl on a cruise ship. But they are definitely not conducive to snoozing beneath.
• … gyms and weight rooms. Ever been around when someone is lifting weights or, more importantly, done lifting and plopping them down on the floor? And gym facilities tend to host a lot of activities that involve jumping, bouncing and other rather loud movements.
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• … the pool deck. While this may not seem obvious, keep in mind that deck chairs will likely be moved around, particularly in the morning. There’s also the possibility of a DJ or band playing at any given time.
• … the galley. As you might imagine, preparing thousands of meals a day is not exactly a quiet task. It’s can also involve the kitchen staff working around the clock, making it yet another area to avoid being above or below.
How To Avoid Trouble Spots
Other things we typically look for on deck plans if we want to avoid potential noise issues? Check the placement of staircases and elevators. While this has never been an issue for us, some light sleepers might find themselves awakened by late-night revelers returning to their staterooms.
If possible — and here’s where both deck plans and travel agents can come in handy — try and avoid being directly across the hall from service areas used by the crews. Why? Those doors see a lot of traffic and, depending on the ship, that can mean a lot of loud bangs.
As always, the best advice we can possibly give with regard to finding your perfect stateroom is to do a little bit of research. Look at deck plans. Consult a travel agent. Heck, you’d be surprised how many times we’ve found reviews for our individual staterooms by searching YouTube for the name of our ship and the specific cabin we’re considering!
Take the case of the complaining passengers whom we met at the beginning of this story. A quick look at the deck plans would have shown that they were directly above a venue hosting loud events. Picking another stateroom would have saved them — and the poor guest relationships person tasked with handling their complaint — a headache or two.
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